Friendship.

I try not to ever complain in public posts, because I feel as though it diminishes the difficulties so many people are going through, and I just never want to sound like that person who isn't grateful for my awesome life. I'm not that person - I like my life a lot. That being said, we all have tough weeks and last week was very tough for me.

It was one of those slippery-slope weeks where I just had this sinking feeling every day, even though I attempted a bright attitude and worked hard, that each day was going to be a challenge. So many things fell apart, mistakes were made, arguments were had, and overall I ended Friday pretty deflated and miserable. I needed uplifting, big time. That, coupled with severe homesickness for my family and a lot of other family-heaviness I discussed lightly in my last post, made it difficult for me to maintain any semblance of my cheery self. Last night, I was all but fetal by the time 1am came around, and quite frustrated with God, the world in general, and myself.

So today when I finally let myself get up (late), I anticipated a day of being a loner in order to get my head back on straight without biting any innocent bystanders' off. I felt content punishing myself with hours of practice and organizing and budgeting, and hoped I could just be left alone to my own devices to "solve all my problems," like I constantly, stubbornly, attempt to do.

I was laying in bed, staring at the ceiling and plotting out my plan of "attack" when I got a buzz from my cell on my nightstand. It was from Amanda... who lives under my same roof. "Want to get brunch with me? I know I am just a room away right now, so it's probably weird I'm texting you, haha." (Not her exact words, but you get the picture). My initial impulse was to say "No, I really cannot afford it. I need to save my cash." But, my own thoughts intercepted this before I sent it via text saying, "maybe getting out of your own way needs to be the mission today." Amanda is like a sister to me; after years of friendship and living together, we are able to handle one anothers' highs and lows, moods and crankiness, and even momentary pauperism. So, instead, I said "Yes absolutely, give me 30 minutes!"

I'm so grateful I did. Brunch wound up being the most therapeutic 2 hours of my week, filled with reminders of who I am - who we are as friends - who she is as such a wonderful person in my life - and what being in New York City is even about. We laughed at the rough moments from the week. We laughed at the probable future rough times to come. We outlined better days for our individual selves. Two passion fruit mimosas later, we were heading into the city to do some shopping, wound up buying new things for our apartment, came home to leftover Indian food, a Netflix queue and completely lifted spirits.

From beginning to end today, I was never allowed a moment to feel down about the events of the week, or stressed for the week to come. Sure, I never made it to the church I planned to try tonight, and I owe Grandma Bee a phone call tomorrow, but I feel like myself again before another unpredictable week.

At least I know at the end of the days this week, I've got an apartment filled with new rugs, shower curtains and pictures, and above all a really amazing friend to laugh at it all with.